The truth

Hmm... This is another time that i deactivate it ...and hope it's gonna last long ..it's better not to see anything ..it's better not to know anything anymore...How am i now?..  I am not doing fine.. got wat i mean?... I am not doing good and fine... I have no mood to eat..i have no mood to go to class..i have no feeling to anyone..i have no feeling to laugh though my friend told me really funny stories.. i have no feeling to hear any one story...I hate everything that's me...I am not a good listener...I am not a good adviser also cuz even myself i still can not do wat i suggest other...I am bored...I don't need someone.. Just bored ...Pain and hurt are friend of me ...I have no feeling to smile ...I am kind of jealous when i saw my friend emo cuz of missing someone ....That's not the right feeling that i suppose to have.... I don't have someone and i don't want anymore... I am tired...I am lonely..every time i see my phone it' s just nothing....Only the time ,that's wat i can see from my phone screen...no complain message , no hi or hello message... it's another time tat i have to come back to this situation where emptiness is with me...I can't let my feeling control me...cuz feeling already screw my life for many time..  i skip test..skip class ..drink  ... and even almost smoke... It's time to ignore every thing ..and finish up the things in front of me... the thing that i am doing...the thing and the only thing tat can help me in future.. though in the end i will get only one paper...do it !! remember , that stupid paper is ur future...One day, i will b big enough till u can not reach me... I am gonna b so mean to u like u mean to me... I promise , i will